Metaphorically?

When is a metaphor not a metaphor? I was amused by two unusual linguistic twists that came my way over the last few days, one intentional, the other presumably not.

The first was a pithy aphorism in a blog somewhere (sorry, I've forgotten whose):

"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you do criticize them, you will be a mile away, and you will have their shoes."

I think this is sound advice, especially for cyclists or pedestrians aggrieved at the behaviour of drivers of large and lethal lumps of metal weighing several tons, like the one who swerved around me, missing me by inches as I was walking across a zebra crossing yesterday...and this was after I'd returned to Flatchester from Paris...

The second gem was part of a piece on BBC Radio Four's Sunday programme, prompted by a call from the National Secular Society for hospital chaplains no longer to be funded by the National Health Service. After hearing from various members of the clergy, the presenter posed the question, "While the chaplaincy system may be changing, what is the experience of patients on the hospital floor now?"

If it was me, I expect I would want someone to help me get back into my bed, but no-one in the programme seemed to think this obvious point was worth discussing.